So here i am preparing for rosh hashana when out pops a face from long ago. the fish head! no actually its Mel like OMG! I'm TFWOT! (made that one up for you) such great news hope you save some of that wine for like other people whatever....just saying
Dearest Chanie and DAVID(wow did anyone ever tell you, you look just like a Lazerowitz-Tanta Feigs Srully!?!) I wish i could've made the vort:( YOsef said it was beautiful! Can't wait for the wedding!!!:) Love, Batsheva & Yosef Dwek(cousin)
I would like to begin this evening’s services with a prayer to the SEO G-Ds. oh lords in cyberspace, please grant us plentiful 301 redirects in the upcoming year, and an endless bounty of latent semantic indexing, with splash pages, supplemental results, reciprocal links, and meta data/meta tags, through these trying times, amen.
I would like to continue with a prayer to the G-Ds of law. oh lords in tort liability, antitrust litigation, ambulance chasing heaven, if-id-have-dones-it-heres-how-i-would-have, lordy lords, (thats three minutes we will call it an hour and ill have my secretary send you the bill.) please ensure that the statute of limitations on the sovereign immunity does not overlap in separate jurisdictions, causing a discrepancy in stare decisis, and forcing every litigant to sherperdize every potential claim. And please allow for it to not interfere with my golf break....amen.ken yihi ratzon bizichut avraham avinu. (remember to concentrate on G-D being a G-D of mercy, not judgment, as this prayer is written with C++ not JAVA)
that being said, I would like to take a moment to wish a special mazal tov to Dave and Chani-Katia(what if you get to call me by my english name then I get to make up and english name for you and call you by it.) Katia, Im not sure if you are aware of the catch that you...well caught. you see dave may be too modest to admit this in public, but he holds the world record for number of sardines caught in one fishing expedition. i know, i know, its hard to believe, but im telling you, its true. i was there. well i wasnt actually there, but he brought home this paper award which i guess he could technically have printed off of his computer, but why would he lie? i mean i guess the 89 million dollar prize he got from it would be a good reason, but he had a pickle business, so why would he need the sardines? anyway, what Im trying to say is, Dave is a one of a kind guy, and you are one lucky lawyer lady, even with your captain hook eye patch.
That being said, Dave, chani seems to be an awesome girl as well, even if she is too cool for clubhouse. Btw I am your father…ok not really, but the French manager at clubhouse seems to think you are mine. Scary…perhaps. Insane….maybe. frightening….probably.........nope that’s it. Nothing further your honor. Anyway, Katia seems like a nice girl, and you are probably lucky to be getting her, even if she is a lawyer. (hey Im not included in the stereotype for another 4 years, so I get to make lawyer jokes as much as I want until then!!!!!!) and from what I can tell, you two make the perfect couple, and will be very happy together.
So in the words of the famous Peruvian comedian….toda persona kai hablas espanol, reanse, como si akabo, de deseer algo, chestoso. And may you spend a lifetime together in health, happiness, and keyword density, and always have a bountiful crop and pleanty of cows on your dairy farm.
Oh, and Build a bayis neeman biyisroel while the interest rates are still down from Obama cuts. MAZAL TOV. amen!!!
Mazel Tov Chani and of course to your Chosson,too! What wonderful news! May you both be zoche to build a bayis neeman b'yisroel! (it's hard to spell that in english, but you get the point!...)
mazel tov to both of your families as well.
:), Devorah Shacter
Mazel Tov Chani! IT seems like just yesterday Yisroel and I were driving you home to Brooklyn after Batya's wedding. And now you are off to your own Chupah! Mazel tov and all the best! Malka & Yisroel Weiser
Mazel Tov Yechiel, I still remeber those friday pick up games and what great senior you were to all the freshies at Toras Chaim. Very excited for you. Chani i am sure you know this, you are really getting a great guy!
Mazel Tov Chani:
Lenny and I are both thrilled as well as Mishket, Giti, Leah, Chaya and Rayze
Good things are worth waiting for and just by looking at Yechiel's picture it says it all; what a kind face he has and he must have a terrific personality and sense of humor to top it all off
We cannot wait to meet him at the vort
May the two of you be as happy as you look in the picture the rest of your lives and may Hashem shine on you both always and wherever you go may only the good angels spread their wings for you to walk on
Lenny and Myriam Fuchs
It's amazing what can change in a few short weeks. It felt like just yesterday that my good friend Mel was in my dining room complaining how awful dating was and how girls were "icky." At the time, Mel was 5'8, balding, and wanted in four states. Mel's shirts were unbuttoned almost halfway down, chest proudly on display, goldchains hanging from his neck. Mel's elbows were particuarly ashy, and his mouth contained a goldtooth, which Mel used to bite small animals. Flash forward a few weeks later, and much has changed. Mel has been exonerated from his crimes, and has locked up those responsible. Mel stands at a proud 6'4, with long flowing hair that glistens in the afternoon sun. Mel now wears only the finest silk hand woven by chinese monks, his goldchains replaced by a tasteful lip-ring. Most importantly, Mel likes girls. Particuarly, one Chani Lazerowitz, who is probably very very scared right now. Fear not Chani Lazerowitz! Mel, with his jackhammer-like arms and smooth, british accent, will defend you from all ofhis strange strange friends. I hope that both of you continue changing for the better, and that you build a beatiful bayas neeman together. Also, you should be zoche to own a plane.
MAZEL TOV! Hey look at this I am the first to sign! (That's because everyone else is on facebook). Chani it's such an exiting news, I am sooooo happy for you! David you are getting an AMAZING GIRL!!!! May the two of you have be zoche to build a bais neeman b'yisroel and may the simcha you feel today only grow and get stronger! Cant wait to see you soon! - Avrumi & Rachel Fridman
Mazel tov Chani!!! I was so happy to hear the good news this morning. May you and your chassan have a life filled with happiness, bracha and hatzlacha. Can't wait to meet the lucky guy by the vort. Mazel tov to the whole Lazerowitz clan. Love, Gittie Berger